18:27 – Missing my angel & feeling miserable
I found this beautiful song on youtube. I’m missing my little boy terribly at the moment. Don’t get me wrong, I think about him every single day and every day it hurts, but sometimes, well sometimes...
View Article00:01 – A pharmacy error (and still struggling)
I think it would be fair to say that I’m struggling a lot at the moment. On the outside I’m trying my hardest to appear ‘OK’… maybe even better than OK… I started back my part time home based...
View Article23:33 – Telling lies to A&E doctor :(
In the past week I haven’t posted because I’ve been feeling so low and if I had written anything it would have made for some pretty depressing reading. Not that this post won’t be but it feels like...
View Article16:54 – In a pretty crappy place right now
So yeah, I spent the weekend getting drunk by myself. Sitting here pouring glass after glass of wine and drinking it at a ridiculous speed. I don’t know what I hoped to achieve by doing that, I guess I...
View Article01:15 – A temporary safety plan
Today I have tried my hardest to start being honest with people. Best friend text me out of the blue last night asking how I was. I contemplated sending the “fine thanks” reply but decided that no, I...
View Article15:12 – Bad weekend, A&E, self harming and more
**Please note this post is (a) very long and (b) contains talk of self harm so could be triggering** Since I last posted things have been shit. Beyond shit in fact. The constant urges, needs,...
View Article22:27 – What I wish I could say to my friends & family
This is one of the posts I started writing a few days ago when I was having a bit of an emotional moment thinking about my little boy, missing him so badly, my heart just feeling completely broken. I...
View Article19:34 – Here comes a RANT
As the title says – here comes a rant… So as most of you already know I don’t get on very well with CPN#2 but I have tried to attend some of my appointments with her mainly because I thought if I...
View Article00:01 – Hoping and praying I’m doing the right thing
So… since I last posted I have made the rather huge decision to accept the offer of the housing transfer. I went with my Mum to view it for a second time on Friday afternoon and then had an hour to...
View Article17:35 – Slipping, sliding, swinging moods
I am stressed. Extremely stressed. And my anxiety is sky high. I am taking more Diazepam each day than the amount I am prescribed meaning that I would have run out about a week early if I didn’t have...
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